Fill 'er up

Today I had my first "fill" on the band around my stomach and this day couldn't have come fast enough as far as I was concerned. I mentioned several posts ago that when I first had the surgery, the band that was placed around my stomach didn't give very much restriction at all. My body needed time for everything to heal internally before anything else could be done. Today marked 7 weeks since my surgery. I hope that today I can help you to have a better understanding of what is involved with the lap band surgery and all that occurs after the surgery is complete. This is me being weighed in......

The nurse totalling up my weight loss since the surgery. I was kinda bummed that their scales showed that I've lost 26.5 pounds when my friendly scales at home say that I've lost 30. But I'm not gonna split hairs over a couple pounds. I'm just so happy that for the first time in a very long time, the numbers are going down instead of up!

Having my blood pressure checked. I've never had a problem with it, and in fact I always like to rub it in to my husband when I have mine checked because his is on the high end. Mine today was 116/64.

And what you've all been waiting for......This is what is inside of me now. On the left side is the band that is around my stomach and attached with stitches. On the right is the port that is directly to the right of my belly button just under the skin. In fact, you can feel it if you press on my stomach just barely. This port is where the saline is injected to do the fill, but I'll get to that later. The tube in the middle is what connects the two and how the saline gets from the port to the band.

A closeup of the band....

Ooh, now I'm gettin scared! This is everything laid out to do the procedure.....

Ok, now for a little bit of humor. My wonderful sister went with me to my appointment to be my photographer and we were sitting in the procedure room waiting and waiting and waiting..... for the surgeon. He was 1 hr. 15 min. late for my appointment, but who's counting, right? We were just talking and laughing when she looked down and saw my leopard print socks peeking out from under my now famous camouflage pants and she just had to take a picture of them! Just wait until you see what the bottom half of her legs looked like! You'll have to check out her blog...The Vintage Attic in a few days to find out just what it was!

Alright, back to business. This is the man who was responsible for my surgery. Anuj Prashar, DO. He's just too friendly for me to be mad at him for running so late. He is prepping my stomach for the injection of saline.

Almost ready.....

And here it is....OUCH! Well, it wasn't really that painful. It felt just like having your blood drawn. He injected 4 c.c.'s of saline into the port. Just to give me an idea of how much that was, he explained to me that from now on,I will only receive .5 c.c.'s of saline in future fills.

I really can't believe I'm actually showing my stomach to the whole world! Really, I think I'm going to regret this, but I promised in the beginning to share the good, the bad, and the ugly, so here's the ugly......

A closeup. Here you can see my largest scar directly above my belly button and above them, you can see 2 of the smaller scars. The other 2 are on the other side of my stomach.

Before I could leave, Dr. Prashar had to be sure that I could tolerate some water without getting sick. I had no problem.

Now, he saved the bad news for last. This is him explaining to me that I had to go back to a clear liquid diet for 48 hours. HUH? ARE YOU SERIOUS????? I didn't know that! Well, too late now! It's already done!
Oh yeah, and after the 48 hours are over, I am only allowed to have one bite of food every 5 minutes. It is very important to eat super slow because it takes awhile for your brain to get the signal from your stomach that it's full and I don't want to risk stretching my stomach. Yeah, it can happen. That's how people who've had weight loss surgery can sometimes gain weight back. If your not careful, just a little bit of overeating at a time can stretch the stomach out to where it can hold more food and then the surgery was a waste. Well, not totally, but I don't want that to happen to me, so I'm doing my best to follow all of the rules. Anyhow, Dr. Prashar explained to me that at first, I may be full on only 2 bites of food, so it is very important to eat very slowly. For some people, they can hold more. It's just trial and error until you find the right amount of restriction on your band. Everyone is different. I may only need 1 fill, I may need 3 or 4. It just takes alot of tweaking to find your "sweet spot".

And were done! This is me with the incredible and talented Dr. Prashar. But I'm not biased at all!~

If you or someone you know is interested in weight loss surgery, you can contact Dr. Prashar at

The Weight Loss Clinic
1110 Professional Court

Suite 201

Hagerstown, MD 21740

301-714-4044

My New Friend

Food used to be my friend. It’s what I would turn to on nights when my husband was working and my boys were tucked snuggly in their beds. It kept me company, never talked back, and never ever looked at me disapprovingly. With my surgery, I had to say goodbye to my old friend. And it was a very hard goodbye to make. But just as quickly as I said my goodbyes, I made a new friend. She’s been wonderful to me and just what I needed in this time of my life. She has always been honest and truthful with me and most importantly, has told me exactly what I want to hear. We communicate with each other first thing every morning. She is the first thing I think about when my feet hit the ground. It's a brief exchange each morning, but she leaves me smiling all throughout the day. But it turns out, I’m not liking my new friend too much lately. She’s turned on me. And it almost makes me want to turn back to my old friend food. Want to know who she is? It’s my scales. We’ve had a falling out and I’m mad at her. For the past 7 weeks, I have weighed myself every morning without fail. And almost every morning, I had lost at least 1 pound. But for the last week, the scale hasn’t budged. And I don’t like it one bit! I liked weighing myself every morning because it kept me motivated and proved to me that my hard work was paying off, but now I’m just working hard with no results. I consulted with one of the trainers at the YMCA where we are members. Her advice? INCREASE my calories and do cardio 6-7 times per week for 1 hour. Not gonna happen! First of all, I’m not supposed to increase my calories above 1200 per day and secondly, I have a life. And that life does not include loading my children up 6-7 times each week to go exercise. So, what do I do? Well it’s a good thing that I have my first “fill” on my band tomorrow. I’m really hoping that this gives me the boost that I need to continue losing weight. And of course I can’t wait to speak with the surgeon to get his input. Stay tuned tomorrow for pictures of what my band looks like and hopefully I’ll get some shots of the actual fill taking place too. Should be interesting. And maybe, just maybe, my good friend and I will make up and be kind to each other again! Keep your fingers crossed!

I Ain't There Yet.....

……But Look at me now!

I was at the gym today doing my usual 30 minutes on the elliptical and listening to my music on my MP3 player and honestly, I didn’t want to be there. That song “Rainy Days And Mondays” kept going through my head. Today we had both. Lots and lots of rain. I really didn’t want to even get out of my pajamas let alone leave the house, but my dear husband pushed me to go. He really wanted to go and insisted that I go too. So, being the obedient wife that I am (oh dear when he reads this, he’s gonna gag!) I went with him. And we drug our 2 littlest sons with us in this awful weather. The oldest one was at school. After we dropped the boys off at the childcare area, my husband went off to do his thing and I was dragging my feet to get to the fitness center. My husband usually lifts weights first and then does his cardio while I like to do it the other way around. Except I usually use the machines instead of free weights like he does. But I think he took pity on me because he came over to the cardio side and got on the elliptical right next to me. Well, not being one to be shown up, I felt like I had to work out hard with him beside of me. I decided to do something different this time. Instead of working the elliptical manually, I set it to do a program for me. I chose the one for weight loss. This particular one gives you several minutes of intense resistance and then a few minutes of no resistance and over and over again. I started out alright, but by about 15 minutes, I was ready to be done. Then something happened. A song started to play. It’s one by my favorite artist, Kirk Franklin. I’ve heard it a million times. But this time, I really listened to the words. My inspiration was kicking in! I played it over and over again and before I knew it, I was at 40 minutes! More than I’ve ever done on the elliptical! It was just what I needed to hear to get me through the morning! So I wanted to share it with you. I know that I have much more work to do and I’m only 1/3 of the way towards reaching my weight loss goal, but when I look back to 2 months ago, I can truly say that I’ve come a very long way! And I just want to say to all of those people, yes even some family members that doubted that I would ever make anything of myself and that I would be successful in this new season of my life…….


LOOK AT ME NOW!!!!





Persecuted, criticized, been denied and abandoned
Pushed away, given away, some days I couldn't imagine
Getting harder, getting colder, was hard for me to see
Tired of runnin', tired of hurtin', even got tired of me
Tired of cryin', tired of tryin' to forget my mistakes
Tired of bein' in this storm, how much more can I take
Many nights in my life, tell me why
I shed more tears, my eyes would allow
And after all that

Look at me now!
I'm stronger this time around!
Not because I was so good, but somehow
You looked past where I was
And you knew I'd come through cause You loved me
Look at me know!
So many didn't make it through
That's why this heart belongs to only You!
How can I complain 'bout the pain I went through
Cause it grew me
Look at me now!

Had no hope, had no future, even too hard to dream
No one told me, “boy, you can be whatever you want to be”
Then You saved me and You gave me reason to breathe again
Not perfect, ya'll, but I'm gon' run 'til I make it to the end
(It ain't easy when your life's filled with wounds that won't heal)
And you fight through the lies trying to find what's for real
Everyone wants the prize but they can't stand the pain
The strength I needed it came that night I cried out Your name
To my people in the struggle, all my soldiers and believers
To my survivors of Rita, Katrina and even FEMA
(All things are working together for our good)

Look at me now!
I'm stronger this time around!
Not because I was so good, but somehow
You looked past where I was
And you knew I'd come through cause You loved me
Look at me know!
So many didn't make it through
That's why this heart belongs to only You!
How can I complain 'bout the pain I went through
Cause it grew me
Look at me now!

Yes, I've seen some hard times
Some bad choices that I've made fell back on me
But now it's time to move on, move on
Can't let my past hold down my destiny
And even though I don't always know
Why you allow the night to last so long
But when I see the sunlight
It was only to make me strong

Look at me...
Look at me...
Look at me...
Look at me, look at me

I'm better now! I'm closer now!
I'm thankful now! I'm happy now!
Look at me! Look at me!
I'm stronger now! I'm patient now!
I'm grateful now! I'll praise you now!
Look at me! Look at me!

Blockhead

Mmmm...I just love the smell of Home Depot. You know, that aroma that smacks you right in the face as soon as you walk through those double doors. It's the tantalizing blend of sawdust and paint with just a hint of fertilizer. There's nothing like it. Maybe it's because it reminds me of when I was a little girl and I would walk into my father's wood shop to watch him work on one of his latest creations. Or maybe it's because each time I've ever had the occasion to go to Home Depot, it was to purchase supplies for a project in our home, which by the way, hasn't been very often. My husband is not a "project" kinda guy. I think it's the excitement of a project. The thrill of creating something, making some changes to your environment, or making improvements. I just love it! So, a few days ago when I snuck out to run some errands while my hubby and boys were napping, and after dodging carts and the angry mob at Wal Mart, I ran into the Depot to see if they had what I needed for a “project” I had in mind. A little while ago, I found this awesome blog Punkin Seed Productions and I was so inspired by the adorable little blocks that Kristi created. She sells them on her Etsy site. I decided to try my hand at it. You wouldn’t think that wooden blocks would be that difficult to find, but apparently they are not a popular item at all of the craft stores. I couldn’t find what I was looking for anywhere. Off to Home Depot I went. As a side note, I much prefer the fellas in orange to the guys at Lowe’s. In my experience, the employees are much friendlier and willing to help you. For example, several years ago I had this crazy idea to make our bed really high like those ones you see in all of the decorating magazines. I read in a book that one way to make your bed higher was to use 4 inch wide plumbers PVC pipe to rest your bed frame in. I went to Lowe’s. They acted like I was crazy and they wouldn’t cut the lengths that I needed. The fellas in orange over at the Depot were more than happy to oblige. In fact, they not only made me feel as if I wasn’t crazy, but they gave me the impression that they do that kind of thing every day for silly housewives trying to keep themselves busy with projects around the home. Well after spending $20 on the piping, it didn’t work. So I went to plan B. For the past 5 years, my bed frame has been sitting on cinder blocks that are hidden underneath 2 layers of bed skirts. You’d never know it. Anyway, I’m getting off track here. I quickly found a gentleman to help me with what I needed. He found the exact size of lumber that I was looking for and cut it into little blocks for me right there on the spot.


For $6.00, I purchased an 8 ft. length of 1x3, which was cut into about 30 or so 2 and 3 inch blocks, and some sandpaper.

When I arrived home and walked through the door, my very wise husband who has learned over the years not to question my ideas, just looked at my little box of blocks and sandpaper and shook his head and smiled. I could not wait to get started. This is where I should tell you that I forgot to take pictures of the process. I always do that. I somehow remember to take before and after photos, but get so excited to do the project that I always forget the in between stuff. So anyhow, I found some white paint from my stash of craft supplies and got down to business. It took 3 coats of craft paint to cover the blocks. I think next time, I'll try regular paint, not the acrylic craft kind. But while the paint was drying, I managed to keep myself busy rummaging through all of my scrapbook papers to find coordinating colors to decoupage onto my blocks with good old Mod Podge! My husband even helped me choose the papers to use. He's so supportive of my silly ideas! These were going to be a gift for a friend's birthday, so we chose colors we thought she'd like. My wonderful sister, Melissa from The Vintage Attic introduced me to Mod Podge a few months ago and my life has never been the same. Love the stuff! Oh yeah, that reminds me, I owe her a bottle since I "borrowed" hers and used it all up. Sorry, Miss. I'll get right on that. So, when the decoupaging was done, I found some ribbon and embellishments to put the finishing touches on the blocks. I chose chipboard letters to spell out the word "Diva". Actually, it was my husband again who came up with the word to use. I only had the size I needed in blue, so I painted them brown. I glued them on and put a coat of Mod Podge over the letters and paper. My friend has 4 children, so I chose a charm for the first letter of each of her children's names to decorate one of the blocks. I used ribbon, flowers and gems to decorate the rest of them.

I didn't want to leave the backs of the blocks bare, so I stamped words to describe my friend on the backs of them....

Project complete! It took me 2 days to complete, but I couldn't be any happier with the results! Have I mentioned how much I love craft projects? Well I do! I love love love them! I'm getting all giddy inside just thinking of my next one! And again, just like my last project, because my hands were busy (and also covered in Mod Podge) I paid no attention to the food in the kitchen calling my name! My new motto.....Busy hands make for a skinny diva!

Just Call Me Julie

I'm taking a little detour from my usual topics tonight....

You can just call me Julie for now. Has anyone seen the movie "Julie and Julia?" Well, I feel like Julie in that one scene when she gets super duper excited because she has 1 comment on her blog, then disappointment soon follows when she realizes it's from her mother! Yeah, that's me. I know, I'm a dork. What is it with us bloggers and our obsession with getting comments? Is it our need to feel validated? Or our need to want someone to like us? What do you think? I dunno. But I find myself checking my blog like 5....or 50 times a day to see if anyone left me a comment. That's weird, isn't it? Tell me I'm not the only one! Please tell me you do this too. Hey! Is anybody listening? ANYONE? ANYONE AT ALL? Yeah, probably not. That's what I thought! Well, at least I know my husband reads my blogs! That counts for something, right? Anyway, if your reading, Thanks! And......does anyone know how to bone a duck? Hee hee hee......

Let's Make A Deal

My husband made a deal with me. He has been putting up with me whining about how I need some new clothes for a few weeks now. Each time we are getting ready to go anywhere outside of the house I go through at least 5 outfits before I find one that I’m somewhat satisfied with. Most of my clothes are too big for me now. Well, actually I could still wear some of them for a little while longer, but there’s just something about losing weight that makes you want to show yourself off. I don’t want to wear those baggy clothes anymore. I want to buy some things that fit me and in a size that I haven’t worn in a few years. So I guess he finally got tired of hearing it, so he made me an offer that I could not refuse (with a little bit of negotiating and some sweet talk thrown into the mix). We have separate closets for both his and my sanity. Mine is ridiculously organized. All like things hang together, first dresses, then skirts, followed by long pants, then capris, next is sleeveless shirts, then short sleeves, long sleeves, jackets, sweaters, and so on. And of course, all the same hangers hanging in the same direction. His is not. You know that saying that Forrest Gump made famous? Life is like a box of chocolates…you never know what your gonna get. Well, Tom’s closet is kind of like that. You never know what might fall out when you open the door. So, he told me that if I cleaned out his closet for him, I could have some money to buy new clothes. I humored him into thinking that he was in control of the situation. Because you know if I really really wanted to, I could just get the clothes without cleaning his closet and he would never say a word. But, all is fair in love and war, so I accepted his offer. The bidding started at $200. I quickly reminded him that I really need to replace EVERYTHING. Of course, I’m not silly enough to spend it all at once. I realize I’m going to go through several sizes before I reach my goal, but I really do need some things right now. You know- underwear, bras, a pair of jeans, a few shirts, some workout clothes and for my honey, I just might buy a new nightie too! So with that reminder, he moved it up to $250. I still wasn’t satisfied. I won’t tell you exactly what I whispered in his ear at that moment, but what I said got me an extra $50! What can I say, I got it like that! So, this morning I started on my part of the deal. Whew! I didn’t know what I was in for. This is going to need to be done in stages. It might take a few days. But it will all be worth it when I’m sporting a new outfit soon. Oh yeah, I’m not sure exactly when it is that I will get to go shopping since the one stipulation that my husband was firm on is that I will need to wait until we receive our income tax refund. Bummer. But I can wait! Can anyone say…SHOPPING SPREE?

Lift And Support

Robinwood Medical Center. Green Entrance. Room 122. Every third Tuesday evening. 6:00-7:00 p.m. Definitely where I needed to be last night. I went to my first support group meeting for patients of The Weight Loss Clinic in Hagerstown, MD. I wasn’t sure what to expect. I’ve never been to anything like this before and quite honestly, I should have gone a long time ago, but kept finding excuses why I couldn’t make it. I guess I didn’t want to admit to myself that I needed something like this. But I did. And I do. About 25 people were there. All of us with two things in common. We’re overweight and everyone in attendance has had one of two types of weight loss surgery- gastric bypass or lap band. When I first walked into the room, there were 3 people there… The leader of the support group (who is not at all overweight, by the way), an extremely overweight woman (I would estimate her to be at least 450 lbs.), and me (somewhere in between). I signed in and tried to make myself look busy rummaging through my purse, for what I have no idea. I just didn’t want to make eye contact with anyone. I don’t know why. Quickly the room filled up and the meeting began. I met a woman beside of me who had gastric bypass surgery 2 years ago and is now a size 8. She’s lost 170 lbs. She looks amazing! Then I met the woman in front of me (the one who I estimated to be about 450 lbs) . She had surgery 5 months ago and has lost 69 lbs so far. Awesome! Then I met a woman who had lap band surgery, like me, around the same time I did. She’s lost 25 lbs. Way to go! Oh my, why didn’t I come sooner? We spent the first 30 minutes listening to the leader speak to us about setting and maintaining goals. The information was really good. Then for the next 30 minutes, we split into 2 groups. Gastric bypass patients on one side and lap band patients on the other. We went around the circle giving our names, our surgery date and how much weight we’ve lost. I heard some success stories and a few who weren’t so successful. Then came my favorite part of the evening. We got to ask questions. Most of the people had surgery long before I did, so they were able to answer all of my questions, and trust me, I had lots of them! At the end, we had the opportunity to sign up for a clothing swap if we were interested . I would loved to have done it, and still might, but everyone there was already larger than me, so I wouldn’t be able to benefit from it. Bummer. But anyway, I want to share with you what we talked about during the first part of the meeting. This information would be beneficial for anyone, not just people trying to lose weight. And with it still being the beginning of the year, it’s a great time to put this into practice. Using the S.M.A.R.T. method, you are much more likely to be successful in reaching your goals.
S-Specific
M-Measurable
A-Attainable
R-Realistic
T-Timely

SPECIFIC…
Goals should be straightforward and emphasize what you want to happen. Specifics help us to focus our efforts and clearly define what we are going to do.
Specific is the Who, What, When, Where, Why, and How.
Who are you going to have to support you in your goal? What are you going to do? What is your goal? When would you like to accomplish your goal by? How are you going to do it?
Ensure that your goal is very specific. For example, instead of setting a goal to lose weight or be healthier, set a specific goal to lose____ lbs, or ___ in. off your waistline, or to walk 3-5 times per week for 30 min.

MEASURABLE……
If you can’t measure it, you can’t manage it. Choose a goal with measurable progress so you can see the change occur. For example, “I want to read 3 chapter books of 100 pages on my own before my birthday” shows the specific target to be measured. “I want to be a good reader” is not as measurable.
Establish concrete criteria for measuring progress toward the attainment of each goal you set. When you measure your progress, you stay on track, reach your target dates, and experience the exhilaration of achievement that spurs you on to the continued effort required to reach your goals.
Don’t make your goals absolute. Give yourself a little room.
Don’t keep your goals to yourself. You need accountability.

ATTAINABLE….
When you identify goals that are most important to you, you begin to figure out ways you can make them come true. You develop the attitudes, abilities, skills, and financial capacity to reach them. You begin seeing previously overlooked opportunities to bring yourself closer to the achievement of your goals.
Don’t wait for inspiration to start reaching your goals. Begin the work necessary and the inspiration and motivation will follow.
Goals you set which are too far out of reach, you probably won’t commit to doing.
A goal needs to stretch you so you feel you can do it and it will need a real commitment from you.

REALISTIC….
This is not a synonym for “easy.” Realistic, in this case, means “do-able.” It means that the skills needed to do the work are available. A realistic project may push the skills and knowledge of the people working on it but shouldn’t break them!

TIMELY….
Set a time frame for the goal: for next week, in three months, by my birthday. Putting an end point to your goal gives you a clear target to work towards.
If you don’t set a time, the commitment is too vague. It tends not to happen because you feel you can start at anytime. Without a time limit, there’s no urgency to start taking action now.


EVERYONE WILL BENEFIT FROM GOALS AND OBJECTIVES IF THEY ARE SMART.